Friday, September 20, 2013

Praying for peace during bedtime battles

I think that most parents would agree that generally, bedtime is one if the toughest parts of parenting.  We all do our best to set up routines and do calming activities in the evenings. We read stories, give baths, rub backs and generally do everything we can to get out beloved children to sleep. Because let's be honest, we love our children but by 8 o'clock we are ready to watch project runway with a glass of wine. Okay, maybe that's just me but we all need a moment of peace, some uninterrupted conversation and some sleep. 
Bedtime is tough for most kids too. They are usually tired and winding down is tough. Laying still is hard, especially when the blanket is not straight and the room is not the perfect 72 degrees not to mention that itchy spot that seems to jump around their little bodies. 
I have been through many bedtime battles with my bio kids.  Nightmares, spooky shadows, itchy blankets and lost stuffed animals - been there, done that. 

But parenting foster kids is a completely different thing.  Settling down at night is even harder because they really don't want to stop long enough to process how their world has been turned upside down; how much they miss their parents; how they wish their life was different or the same or "normal". They don't want to relax and lay still because it makes them think about their past, worry about the present and fear the future.  Add to this the fact that these young children have never been taught how to talk about these emotions, it's a powder keg just ready to explode into fits of rage, uncontrolled anger and despair. 

This is how bedtimes are at our house.  Some nights can go off without a hitch and it's just over an hour from "okay kids, time to get ready for bed" until all are asleep while other nights are filled with anger, defiance and fear.  

It undoubtedly the most challenging aspect of parenting amplified when foster parenting. 

We continue to pray for peace over our home, for healing in the lives of these children and for grace in all if us as we work through these challenges. 

If you can, please join me in my nightly prayer; which usually starts at 7 pm when the kids begin to get ready for bed. "Jesus, please let your peace which surpasses all our understanding fill this house, envelope Your children and guide our behaviors. Build a hedge of protection around the minds of these children and begin your healing work in their lives. Amen."

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